We meet tons of people in our life but we can only get to know a few of them. I read somewhere before that we can only hold up to 200 people in our social circle. Of course, I don't know if that's really true but it makes sense. It's impossible to keep up with every single person in your Facebook, Twitter or Instagram feed.
In my quest of minimalism, I unfriended a lot of people in my Facebook account because I couldn't bear the information overload. I wanted to see a clean, simple and less populated feed with updates from the people that I really care about and from pages that I'm interested in. I'm allergic to the noise pollution and I'm also allergic to the Internet pollution.
Even now at 400 people, I still think that's too much! I've already removed people with duplicate accounts and deactivated accounts! It was very stressful and tiring to do that just to keep my inner circle small and my life, well, private. I don't really want other people who don't care about me to see my posts, my shared posts and my personal views on things. It's probably why I can't do Youtube. I'm too self-conscious and shy in front of a huge audience. But my blog is a different story for another day.
Anyway, I have a very small Inner Circle of Friends. Also, I only have one Best Friend. She's unfortunate enough to gain the title after more than a decade of friendship. I don't know if she's still mad at me for missing her wedding last year... I swear to God and everything Holy, I will not miss your 25th and 50th wedding anniversary, okay? (I'll even shoulder the payment for the invitations! I've got 25 years to save up for them and to block off the date. I'll be there talaga!)
We can call her Mina because that's how I call her. She's tall, slim and pretty with big, chocolate brown eyes and bigger, curly hair. We've known each other since high school and we haven't let go of each other since.
I think she's beautiful because she has the nicest heart and the sweetest spirit in the entire world. I will always hold her up in the highest regard because she's proven how loyal, kindhearted and gentle she is. She's my favorite friend in the entire world.
When we were in high school, we didn't really spend a lot of time together. Even in college, we didn't really know what's going on with each other's lives. Whenever we crossed paths in the mall, that's the only time that we'll get to catch up and have a long conversation. I don't really remember how we became so close as we became adults but I am very grateful to God for it.
We talk about anything and everything under the sun. Family, friends, work, money... There's nothing that we haven't talked about. Now that she's married, we also talk about marriage, kids and relationships a lot. I can just imagine what kind of wonderful wife and mother she's going to be.
Honestly, I was thrilled when she asked me to be her bridesmaid in her wedding. We were so excited. We'd planned the whole thing together. I was also the one who referred my wonderful friend, Delsa, to her so she'll have a reliable and amazing wedding coordinator.
Unfortunately, I wasn't able to go due to my personal issues at the end of last year... God knows how many tears I cried and tantrums I threw because I couldn't go. It was my fault and I regret not going to the wedding every day of my life. It's just one of the things that was taken away from me by my former company and I will never forgive them for it. It's one of the reasons why I'm going to go to court against them. I'll make them regret it because I nearly lost my best friend.
When I cried to Duckie about this, I told him flatly that she's the only person in the world who kept telling me to stay alive, to hold on and to keep hoping for a better day. She listened to my heartaches, my regrets, my fears, my anger and my sadness. She made me laugh and made me feel hopeful.
She's one of the few people who made an effort and made time to see me at least once a year during the course of our long friendship. She's one of the very few people that I'm willing to take a bullet for. I don't know if she even knows how important and valuable she is to me and my life. She's my best friend and I couldn't even do the one thing she asked from me... I wanted the earth to swallow me whole or for my life to end then and there.
Mina is everything that I'm not and I love her for that. She's family-oriented, she's been working in the same place for years and she's had only one boyfriend in her life. She's logical, rational and plans things in advance. She's gone abroad twice, she's gotten married and she's kicking ass at work. I love and admire her for everything that she's doing in her life. If Duckie is my Polaris then she's my compass.
For the record, I only have few friends in my life and I treasure them dearly. They're like family to me. I was a lonely and sad person until I met them. Without their presence at the right time or right place in my life, I wouldn't be here to write how much I love them. Without their effort to reach out and to ask how I am, I don't know if I'd even have the courage to continue living. They probably don't know how much I truly appreciate them and their gestures.
Friendship is precious and I want to love, care, support and assist my friends as much as I could. I want to be friends with them until we're all old, gray and doddery. I want to have tea with them in afternoons just to reminisce and to see my godchildren grown up. I want to laugh, trade stories and cherish all of our history together. I'll always strive to be a good friend because I'm in the company of good friends.
One of my good friends told me once that I was blessed because I was warm, approachable and enthusiastic. I've got something in me that makes people want to stay.
Our friendships are rich, diverse and full of growth because we have our separate lives. They are the sort of friends who are not always at my side but when we see each other, it's like we're never apart! We're always there for each other. Yes, I have friends who are "best in listening", "best in fan-girling over anime", "best in relationship advice and guidance counselling", "best in drunken revelries ", "best in food-trips", "best in shopping", and even the "best for heartbreaks and solid support."
Mina is the best person for all of these things and more. We haven't talked in a while but I do understand that she's gone through the honeymoon and come back to work. She's busy with her life and I get that. I miss her a lot but I'm willing to give her some space.
That's because we're like sisters in that way. We just need to step back and let time smooth it out. We'll know when we're good again when we see each other.
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